St.Valentine Day' Massacre

"The greatest trick the devil pulled was to make the world belive that HE didnt exist"

I vaguely remember one of the Kevin Spacey dialogues from "The Usual Suspects". It was yet another uneventful eve of Feb 14th. Counting crows. Sitting on the pavement of the beach. Watching couples pass-by in their flashy bikes and face-hiding helmets.

And I sat there with my friends, analyzing just WHY we were all single. And then it struck me. I never TRIED to erase that Single status. Its always been having fun with a gang of friends, passing ridiculous comments to mismatched couples and screaming "Jai Bajrang Bali" when it came to tricky love-dovey situations. Love was in the air. Love was everywhere. But the greatest trick I pulled was to convince the world Love didnt exist in the teeny-weeny heart of mine. I've had some, hmmmmmm, wat do u call eh,....., situations - that - look - like - love - ending - in - messed up - friendship. Strange. But true.

Coming back to the massacre, I made up my mind to play with someone's mind for a while passing it off as a valentine's day prank. Made a list of gals who I've had something lesser than the stage of a "crush". Not that I'm that much of a ladies man, but wat the heck, I'm RESPECTED belive it or not. And I quote a female friend of mine "You're not like other guys u know. Soo refreshing to have a conversation with". Ahem.... So the list contained the names of 2-3 young ladies who, as I mentioned, I kinda kinda had a teeeny weeeny liking in that teeeny weeny heart of mine.

Feb 14th. It was time to wear the "Hitch" hat. Drop the bomb. Show the world I'm not a coward to not express myself to a gal I mite have a crush on. Show I'm a MAN. All nerves hyped up, tension building... I took aim at the target. A cute lil girl who happened to call me once in a while, taking professional advice n all. Funny, coz I had mentioned her name to a friend of hers the previous day, asking if she was single n why no one proposed to her as yet. Doing the background data collection.

Before I could get her number from anyone, BANG! She messaged. "Howz life?" N all other itsy-bitsy details. Ya, ya..I yapped for another 4-5 msgs. Was it a stange co-incidence? Or was it chemistry? Yet to be reasoned out. So I decided to try my luck. Into the 10th message, I popped the phrase "I like you a lot". No reply for abt 10 mins. But the final reply was rather bizzare.

"I have a gal already!". Ok. First signs of her saying "Buzz off". After another mush message, came the reply "Hey! What are u upto?". It was time to call it quits. No use tryin to force the issue. But I've damaged my image wid her..Oh god!! The RESPECT will vanish if I dont explain why I msgd all that shit. And then it happened

"See, I had a dare with my friend AJ. He told me I couldn't propose to the first (single) girl who messaged me on valentine's day. And it happend to be u. So, I was just playing along to prove the point. Sorry for disturbing ya."

"No. I knew it was something like this. I could foretell. lol. Catch u l8r"

And there I was on the evening of 14th February,2006. Single as ever. Sitting with my gang of single friends. Trying to analyze
1) Why girls seem to know they can "foretell" stuff?
2) Why did the stange co-incidence thing abt me askin abt her, n she gettin in touch wid me have to happen on V day?
3) Why were we still single?

St.Valentine' Day Massacre has just begun! Oh n for the girls reading this n going ga-ga, drooling
n stuff "FAT CHANCE! I'm not falling for it"

JAI BAJRANG BALI for some more years....